I Just Don’t Get It
by Laura
Something a friend posted on Facebook today….
What does that even mean? I don’t understand it. I get the part about being kind to others. That’s a nice enough reminder. But the other part. Does it mean there’s a guy in charge? He’s in charge, but you can’t tell? And he wants your life to go the way it’s going, even if it sucks? And he’s right there with you, even when you’re in pain? He can handle everything, even though he won’t actually do anything to make your situation better? And he loves you, but you don’t feel it and he won’t show it it any meaningful way, but you’re supposed to believe it anyway? How is that comforting? If there’s somebody out there who’s watching your life and seeing you in pain and is all powerful, but won’t lift a finger to help your situation, how is that comforting? You’re just supposed to not feel alone, is that it? I don’t feel alone when I’m in pain. A lot of people are in pain.
I just don’t get it. I don’t. I’m sorry. I wasn’t raised with it. I don’t get it. I don’t see how that’s comforting. How is God comforting and protecting you? If you’re uncomfortable and unprotected, how is He comforting you? Nothing is too big for Him. Great. That affects me how exactly? He can do everything, but won’t do anything? Why do people read this shit and feel happier? I don’t want to be loved by that Lord. He sounds like an asshole puppetmaster, smirking behind the scenes while your life falls apart. Who needs that?
I already have one dad whose love is hard to feel. I don’t need another one.
The Grieving Atheist 
Oh I can see where it comes from and how great if you believe it and I guess if it makes you feel secure enough in your own life you can move on and help others, then that is a good thing. ??. But me I can’t get it and I really have tried. Thanks for the great video of your mum,it was lovely!
Not sure if my comment posted so I’ll try again…
Couldn’t agree more. I was mostly atheist before my mum died, but before she became ill I did read one argument that seemed convincing about why god would allow people to suffer: that a good parent allows their children to play in the garden; that even though there’s risk out there, a good parent lets their children go to live fully and independently in the real world. Sounded quite good; I didn’t give it too much thought at the time but when mum became ill I thought about it again and realised that actually, a good parent would absolutely always help should their child come banging on the door because they’d hurt themselves; to ignore them and claim that their injury is a pitfall of free-will would be beyond cruel. And if there’s one thing I’m absolutely certain of in life it’s that the most important thing anyone can be is kind. So I prayed, desperately. I banged on the door. Of course: nothing doing.
The only small comforts we’ve had during this time have come from other people who’ve done their best to help. And pragmatism has helped a bit too; not denying what has happened but trying to face the reality of the situation square on and make the best of what remains after out loss – that has served us better than any talk of extra angels in heaven or god’s great plan.
Great blog by the way. I found it when I did a search on sex and grief and your words were the only sense I read on the matter. Thank you.
Yes, the old “god as an event planner” theory. Working a bit below his “pay grade” don’t you think? Rev. Adam J Copeland even did a Huffington Post blog entitled “5 Reasons to Stop Calling Things ‘God’s Plan’”. I have it bookmarked so that I can “correct” the religious folks who post those “gods plan” things on Facebook using one of their own kind.
Yes. I cannot agree more to the entire post. The longer and the more I’ve thought about people finding comfort in a god who claims to love his “children” yet refuses to help them, the more certain I become that such a creature does not exist. What I find so troublesome especially, are my friends who are mothers who profess this. I understand the concept of tough love and letting your children make mistakes to learn… but no one, absolutely NO parent would let their child be murdered, tortured, raped or go through the pain of losing the most important person in their life if they had the power to stop it. It is disgusting to me that people believe this.