Riding the Grief Coaster

by Laura

You never know what’s going to get to you when you’re grieving. Some people have problems looking at photos or video, but that hasn’t been an issue for me. I assembled a memorial slideshow and suffered no more than a few tears. Then my dad brought over some of my mom’s toiletries and makeup. I opened the case and saw an emery board, a single emery board that looks like it was used maybe once. And I lost it. I told the kids I had to take a quick shower, turned on the water and cried.

I don’t know why. Because my daughter had painted my mom’s nails with new polish just a couple weeks before she died? Because it was something she’d just recently used, just recently held? I can’t say. It just happened. Grieving is an unpredictable bitch.

But I’ll tell you something… Today I was washing dishes when hundreds of teeny tiny little soap bubbles exploded out of the bottle of Dawn and floated around my head for several minutes. Some days that’s all you get, but some days that’s all you need.